She looks calm –
From the outside, the broken-hearted mother looks like any other mother.
Like any other woman.
But do not let appearances fool you.
She is like a swan –
The broken-hearted mother may look placid, calm, serene, but underneath she is working hard, so very hard: to keep afloat, to keep going.
Usually against the tide.
She is exhausted,
The broken-hearted mother.
Paddling against the tide will wear you out. Sooner or later.
So while she appears calm – on the outside
A storm rages within.
Finding strength to get up every day, carry on, find joy in life, to move forward, to not let tragedy define you in a negative way, to not be bitter.
Life is unfair, so very unfair.
She might look calm –
The empty-armed mother
From the outside, well kempt, hair done, time to get things done.
Calmness is coping. Coping is calmness: ‘it is what it is’, as much as you wish it was otherwise, you know that cannot be.
She wishes she did not have to be calm –
On the outside.
For life to be anything but calm.
For life to be full of caring for her baby: playing, feeds, nappies, getting up in the night.
No time to get things done. Hair a mess.
She may look calm.
But look closer.
The tell-tale sign?
The sadness in her eyes.