Latest Posts

  • i-completed-the-2016

    I Completed The 2016 FitBrit Challenge

    A few months ago if you had told me I would have participated – voluntarily – in an challenge that involved multiple exercises back-to-back, I would have laughed. But last Saturday that is exactly what I found myself doing when I took part in the Fitness First FitBrit challenge. I’ve talked before about my life-long […] Read more…

  • nobodys-patient-workshop

    Nobody’s Patient Workshop: St George’s Hospital

    Friday September 23 was a special day, one I have been waiting on for a long time: the Nobody’s Patient workshop at St George’s Hospital. The workshop is a key part of the Nobody’s Patient project and received funding from the Maternity Review Challenge Fund . The project evolved from the grassroots social media change […] Read more…

  • emdr-therapy

    EMDR Therapy, Survived

    The cupboard door was opened. All of the contents, stuffed in the cupboard haphazardly and the door forced shut, tumbled on top of me. I felt suffocated, paralysed. But I emerged. I survived EMDR therapy. I survived EMDR therapy when at one point I thought it was making my symptoms worse, and that it was […] Read more…

  • introducing-a-new

    Introducing a New Wellbeing Series Via Facebook Live

    I’d like to introduce a new series on my blog about wellbeing. My wellbeing posts always receive a positive response, and readers say they learn from them. I enjoy writing those posts, and will continue to do so. I’m doing videos because they are an effective method of conveying a message through visual cues such […] Read more…

Hugo's Legacy

  • When Hugo's Photo Was Used for a Fraudulent Fundraising Attempt

    When Hugo’s Photo Was Used For A Fraudulent Fundraising Attempt

    Friday evening brought an unpleasant shock: a photo of Hugo had been used to illustrate a fraudulent fundraising attempt. First and foremost, it is important to say that thanks to vigilance on behalf of a complete stranger who got in touch with us to alert us, the page was swiftly removed. Thankfully, no money had […] Read more…

  • Nobody's Patient (1)

    Can You Help ‘Nobody’s Patient’?

    Was your baby in neonatal care? Are you a mother who needed special care herself, in adult high dependency or intensive care as the result of your pregnancy or your baby’s birth? Or, did your baby sadly die before, during or after birth? If you would like to share one thing you would like health […] Read more…

Maternity Experience (#MatExp)

  • when-i-thought-my

    When I Thought My Missed Miscarriage Would Never End

    Once upon a time, I thought that miscarriages occurred quickly. A hand clutched to the tummy as pain hit. A gush of blood. Hopes and dreams swept away. Left to pick up the pieces emotionally, thinking of what could – should – have been. Physically, the miscarriage would be over as quickly as it started. […] Read more…

  • My Missed Miscarriage

    My Missed Miscarriage

    Another baby who does not get to develop, grow, thrive, live. Another pregnancy ending in surgery. ____________________ At the end of June I was delighted to discover I was pregnant! This baby was so wanted, so tried for, and conceived naturally. We were over the moon. It didn’t take long for the nausea to kick […] Read more…

Perinatal Mental Health

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    What EMDR Therapy Feels Like

    After my serious illness and the death of Hugo I was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). PTSD happens as the result of trauma. Part of PTSD means that parts of the brain that deal with threats, memory, and decision-making (as well as the links between them) are damaged, meaning it is difficult to distinguish […] Read more…

  • Why We Need To Improve Perinatal Mental Health Support

    Why We Need To Improve Perinatal Mental Health Support

    We need to improve perinatal mental health support. With mental ill health remaining a taboo subject, experiencing mental ill health carrying a stigma, and mental ill health constantly misunderstood this all mental health services suffer from chronic underfunding and insufficient investment in terms of dedicated resources. Perinatal mental health is too often at the bottom […] Read more…

Living with Grief

  • Please don't call me

    Please Don’t Call Me Brave

    Please don’t call me brave. I appreciate the gesture, I really do. I think you are really kind to observe what I do, and to express admiration. It’s not false modesty, not bashfulness. There are no blushes. But being called brave does make me feel uncomfortable, and it isn’t all to do with being in […] Read more…

  • How A Song Showed Me

    How A Song Showed Me A Corner Has Been Turned

    Music provides the soundtrack to our lives. It evokes emotions, memories, reminiscences – both good and bad. Martin and I wanted Hugo’s funeral to be a celebration of his life. Part of that celebration included selecting songs to play during the service. Songs that we loved, that held a special significance for us. We were […] Read more…

Neonatal

  • Two Years of Hugo's Legacy

    Two Years of Hugo’s Legacy

    Today marks two years of Hugo’s Legacy. I was reminded of this by a Facebook memory this morning, which prompted me to think about everything that has happened since I hit ‘publish’ on that first post. In April 2014 I was in that stage of raw, visceral early grief. I was confused, angry, frightened. Full […] Read more…

  • Don't StopContinue(1)

    Don’t Stop, Continue: Bereaved Parents’ Voices Matter

    Every so often I get a song lyric going round and round in my head, burrowing in my brain. The most recent one is Don’t stop, continue It’s from Give It Away, one of my favourite songs by Red Hot Chili Peppers. Events this week have intensified my passion for making sure the voices of […] Read more…

Fitness

  • 22pressups

    What I Learned From The 22 Day Press Ups Challenge

    I recently completed the 22 press ups for 22 days challenge – you’ve probably seen the challenge doing the rounds on Facebook. The concept behind the challenge is to raise awareness of post-traumatic stress disorder amongst combat veterans – tragically in the US 22 veterans take their lives every day. PTSD doesn’t only affect people […] Read more…

  • Workout and Nutrition Advice

    Q & A: Workout and Nutrition Advice from a Personal Trainer

    Today we have a guest post question and answer from someone who on a weekly basis brings me pain, and makes me feel sick….but I forgive him because he lets me punch him. It’s my personal trainer, Matt King. Under Matt’s guidance I’ve transformed the way I look at exercise and nutrition, and if you […] Read more…

Self-Care

  • gratitude journal

    Why I Keep A Gratitude Journal

    Why do I keep a gratitude journal? Well, in its simplest terms the purpose is to keep a record of things I am grateful for. What’s the point, you may ask? That’s a good question. The idea of a gratitude log might seem cheesy, and as though I am expecting every day to be full […] Read more…

  • Starting the Day with Sun Salutations

    Starting the Day with Sun Salutations

    Many a morning I wake up foggy-headed as the result of therapy, and meds. It’s frustrating, especially for someone who used to be a morning person. Too many hours feel wasted because my brain and body felt like they felt so long to be in the world. I’ve never considered myself to be a yoga […] Read more…

Style

  • How to be Stylish During a British Summer

    How to be Stylish During a British Summer

    How do you be stylish during a British summer? It should be simple: flowing dresses, shorts, camisole tops, sandals. A floppy hat, and lots of suncream. But simple a British summer is not. Weather during a British summer is unreliable, with not as many warm, balmy, sunny days as we would like. You have to […] Read more…

  • Choosing Workout Clothes to Boost

    Workout Clothes to Boost Body Confidence

    If you’re feeling a bit intimidated about going to the gym, whatever your shape and size because of body confidence issues, this post may be for you. The gym can feel like it is full of very fit people who know what they are doing and it’s easy to feel pretty rubbish in comparision, especially […] Read more…

Just For Fun

  • on-learning-to-not-be-a

    On Learning To Not Be A Book Snob

    I am a book snob. But I am trying to not be. I love books, always have done, since I was a little girl. And I haven’t always been a book snob: growing up, I wasn’t too fussy about what I read. Enid Blyton books were a firm favourite, and I devoured the Famous Five […] Read more…

  • 40 thoughts for my

    40 Thoughts for My 40th Year

    Tomorrow is my birthday, and I shall be 39. The last year of my 30s! I know, I can’t believe it either… The thought of being 40 next year is nowhere near as scary as when I was 29, and looking ahead to my 30s. Age doesn’t really matter that much, and the events of the […] Read more…